Click to Skip Ad
Closing in...
The Availability Gap: What We Lose When Netflix Wins The Availability Gap: What We Lose When Netflix Wins Mysteries of Laura Review: Debra Messing on NBC Mysteries of Laura Review: Debra Messing on NBC Daily Reads: The 50 Worst Movies Ever Made, The Last Blockbuster Video Stores and More Daily Reads: The 50 Worst Movies Ever Made, The Last Blockbuster Video Stores and More NY Times TV Critic Writes Article About 'Scandal' Creator Shonda Rhimes as an 'Angry Black Woman' NY Times TV Critic Writes Article About 'Scandal' Creator Shonda Rhimes as an 'Angry Black Woman' Comparing Lena Dunham to Woody Allen Is Unfair — to Lena Dunham Comparing Lena Dunham to Woody Allen Is Unfair — to Lena Dunham 'No Good Deed' Reviews: And the Twist Is That It's Good! (Not Really) 'No Good Deed' Reviews: And the Twist Is That It's Good! (Not Really) Now Streaming: 'Silver Linings Playbook,' 'Beginners' on Netflix Now Streaming: 'Silver Linings Playbook,' 'Beginners' on Netflix 'Ocean's Twelve' Is a Great Sequel About How Hard It Is to Make a Great Sequel 'Ocean's Twelve' Is a Great Sequel About How Hard It Is to Make a Great Sequel Why the Unanimous Praise for 'Boyhood' Is Bad for Film Criticism — and for 'Boyhood' Why the Unanimous Praise for 'Boyhood' Is Bad for Film Criticism — and for 'Boyhood' 'A Walk Among the Tombstones' Reviews: A Liam Neeson Movie Worthy of Liam Neeson 'A Walk Among the Tombstones' Reviews: A Liam Neeson Movie Worthy of Liam Neeson Studio Cancels All Screenings of 'No Good Deed' to Preserve Shocking Twist That It's Probably Terrible Studio Cancels All Screenings of 'No Good Deed' to Preserve Shocking Twist That It's Probably Terrible Daily Reads: Alison Bechdel Likes Non-Bechdel Test Passing Movies, Terry Gilliam's Influence and More Daily Reads: Alison Bechdel Likes Non-Bechdel Test Passing Movies, Terry Gilliam's Influence and More 'Transparent' Reviews: Amazon's New Series Is a Game-Changer 'Transparent' Reviews: Amazon's New Series Is a Game-Changer David Lynch on 'Eraserhead,' Women in the TV Industry David Lynch on 'Eraserhead,' Women in the TV Industry Criticwire Classic of the Week: Werner Herzog's 'Aguirre, the Wrath of God' Criticwire Classic of the Week: Werner Herzog's 'Aguirre, the Wrath of God' 'The Expendables 3' Torrent and the Techno-Utopian Delusion 'The Expendables 3' Torrent and the Techno-Utopian Delusion Newspaper Graciously Offers to Run Aspiring Film Critics' Work Without Charging Them Newspaper Graciously Offers to Run Aspiring Film Critics' Work Without Charging Them 'While We're Young': Noah Baumbach's Xer-Millennial Comedy Ponders the Difference Between Sharing People's Lives and Stealing Them 'While We're Young': Noah Baumbach's Xer-Millennial Comedy Ponders the Difference Between Sharing People's Lives and Stealing Them Daily Reads: Why Toronto Is the Best Place for Female Filmmakers, In Praise of Fincher's Women and More Daily Reads: Why Toronto Is the Best Place for Female Filmmakers, In Praise of Fincher's Women and More The Scrambled Sexuality of 'Frozen's "Let It Go" The Scrambled Sexuality of 'Frozen's "Let It Go"

From the Wire: An Intervention For Nicolas Cage

Criticwire By Matt Singer | Criticwire March 16, 2012 at 4:59PM

"Please Nic! Put the paycheck down!"
0
"Seeking Justice."
"Seeking Justice."

I know I already posted a whole list of funny pans of "Seeking Justice" -- the lastest cinematic entry in a 65-part series entitled "Nicolas Cage Needs Cash" -- but this review is so funny, it deserves its own post.  It's by Stephen Whitty from The Newark Star-Ledger, and it's structured as an intervention for Cage on behalf of his friends, family, and fans ("Uncle Francis" is in the other room making risotto):

"There are still flashes in this film of the old wild Nic we first loved back in the `80s. The way how, in an early scene, you sport a silver lamé Mardi Gras mask and dance spastically at a nightclub, waving your hands in the air like you just don’t care. Because you don’t, Nic, and that’s what can still make your work a kind of marvelous, unexpected gift, like some crazy old jazzman’s wild jamming solo.

"But 'Seeking Justice' – which sounds like a Lifetime movie with Heather Locklear, you do realize that, don’t you? – doesn’t have enough of those moments. Instead it just casts you as an average guy (which you are not, and cannot play) and then has you matching wits with vicious criminals who want to hurt your family. Kind of like last year’s 'Trespass.' Kind of like this year’s still-to-come 'Stolen.'"

I haven't seen "Seeking Justice" yet -- and to be honest, the poor reviews still haven't convinced me to cancel my plans to see it this weekend, partly because I love Nic Cage and partly because I'm a clinically diagnosed masochist -- but this piece really cracked me up.  The conceptual review can be pretty dicey -- did anyone try the all-Spanish "Casa De Mi Padre" review? I did an all-Spanish tweet review -- but this one works.

This article is related to: From the Wire, Seeking Justice, Nicolas Cage, Stephen Whitty


E-Mail Updates