Get Outta Your Own Way
BY CYNDI GREENING, MANHATTAN, USA – The irony of it is noteworthy. I spent ten days in NYC covering the Tribeca Film Festival, researching a story and meeting with potential distribution sources for the Zambia films. All in all, a productive and encouraging week. The weekend arrives and I'm getting ready to return to Phoenix. Alec asks, "If you love film and filmmaking so much, why didn't you ever move to NYC or LA? 
That's where the industry is." I explain that my teaching job is at a college in Mesa (which is not in LA or NYC) and that he was growing up in PHX (which kept me there) and I was always a little bit afraid to move in case I wasn't talented enough to make it. Now, after he's grown, I've grown accustomed to a substantial paycheck which makes it challenging to consider any options besides continuing down the teaching path. The "golden handcuffs are on, the mortgage must be paid.
He says all sorts of complimentary things about how smart and talented and skilled I am (he is, of course, terribly biased) and says I'm silly to have worried about such a thing. "I can't work somewhere for $10 per hour or as a "free" intern to get into the business," I say, "I've got to be pragmatic here." He tells me that I am getting in my own way. Do you get the irony here? This is what I am always telling him. Get outta your own way! Why is it so much easier to see what other people should be doing than acknowledging what one needs to adjust? The best thing about this whole conversation is that Alec started noticing how he was getting in his way and I was able to look at my "issues." I can rationalize it by noting that we're both doing "better."
With Todd's help (thanks Todd!), Alec is getting his own job for PBS. He'll be working on a documentary. He has to scan a bunch of photos in HD and then animate them using AfterEffects. Big fun. He's been working on commercials for Dove and several Broadway shows. He was doing a toilet brush for a while (don't really know what commercial that was for). Regardless, he's building some good solid skills and is getting guidance from a post-production artist with a lot of great credits. It's a good thing for a 19-year-old from Phoenix. He loves working. While I was in New York, he rarely got home before eight (8) in the evening.
There's another thing I'm noticing that really gets in the way ... OTHER PEOPLE ... whether it's jealousy or a desire to have one's selfish needs met, several of the other crew members and I have found many other people to be quite unsupportive. There are snide comments about how we're sooooo important now or that we just don't know what it's like to be an average person anymore. We've got family members complaining about things that take us away even though they're not really there when we are. I've decided that one must be extremely determined, self-confident and focused to make it in this business. There are so many things that will come up to stop you (besides yourself), you have to be a real animal about finishing. It brings to mind the Kim Basinger quote about why she was successful when so many others were not ... "They all quit a week too early," she said. So, we're all on the path now, running for the finish line. We'll have to see who crosses and who quits a week too early.
