Here's another series of memorable quotes from blogs, newspapers, websites, and such that I read or overhead recently:

"I got a very generous tip from a stripper who was going on a date. She was on her way to see "Wicked," the musical, with some guy she wasn't all that interested in, but he bought her the dress she was wearing, and the date was all paid for, so she was going despite her disinterest. The meter read $9.40 at the end of the trip. She gave me a $20 and told me to keep the change. I love strippers. They always know how to tip."

From New York Hack blog by Melissa Plaut, Yellow Cab Driver in NYC

"Residence hall students may not watch videos above a G rating when visiting homes in town and may not attend movie theaters. All weapons must be turned in for storage. Trigger locks are required for pistols. Fireworks are not permitted on campus."

From Bob Jones University's on campus living requirements for new students.

"Firstly and foremostly, I am a guy, which (in most cases) means I did not go see Titanic to see DiCaprio...although I think he can be a great actor. Reading through earlier comments, i grew a bit weary of hearing about lame script and shallow characters. I went to see a ship sink...the plot and the characters were, at least to me, a kind of icing on the Cake."

User comment on iMDB about the Oscar winning film, "Titanic"

"I'm Jewish so I don't believe in hell but I believe in fucking."

Overheard in Commonwealth, a bar in Park Slope, Brooklyn.