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On The Stupid Men/Beautiful Women Hollywood Movie Cliche...

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by Tambay A. Obenson
April 10, 2013 12:50 PM
14 Comments
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If I see another film in which some pathetic excuse for a man is shown being suckered into doing something by a woman we could say is so clearly out of his league, I'm going to throw a shoe at the screen as if it was George Bush, and I was an Iraqi journalist!

We've seen it happen far too many times that it's such a cliche now. You know what I'm talking about: the Johnny-boy security guard who's approached by the stunning blond, as she flirts with him, making him believe that she's actually interested in him, when what she's really trying to do is distract him, in order to get to whatever it is that he's supposed to be guarding; or the douche in the bar or club who is lured into a dark corner by some buxom beauty, with promises of a little sexual healing, only to later find out that he's actually going to be her dinner for the evening, as she bites his head off, or sinks her teeth into his neck, because she's really a beast in disguise; or the Jo-schmo who answers a knock on his hotel room door to find 2 scantily-clad delights, smiling back at him, convincing him to let them in (although not much convincing is required), claiming to want to fulfill his every desire, only to later find out that they were paid by someone else to "perform," for a specific purpose.

I'm a man, and like most heterosexual men, I can be a sucker for a beautiful woman. However, I'm also not that stupid. 

I've seen enough movies to know that if some Playboy bunny-type approaches me in a bar, club, or on the street, and is being overtly lustful with me, or is oddly easily receptive to my advances, I'll be instantly suspicious of her motives. What does she really want from me? What do I have that she might need? Is she really a vampire, or werewolf, trying to lure me so that she can drain my blood, or eat me? Is she part of some larger group that wants me dead, and she's the bait I'm supposed to take? Did someone pay her to do this? You know, questions like that (Insert smiley face and wink here).

Color me cynical, but I'm not just going to roll over like an idiot, thinking with the wrong head, only to find myself knee-deep in some shit later on that could be disastrous to my health!

Obviously I'm being somewhat facetious, but seriously, when I watch scenes like any of the above, I'm insulted as a man! And I actually find myself getting annoyed, yelling back at the screen: "Come on man! Look at yourself, and look at her! Why on earth do you think that, realistically, she would actually have any genuine interest in you at all? Especially if you've never met, and she suddenly wants to "twirl your toes." How stupid can you be?""

Yes, these are just movies, but they are in some ways reflective of reality. Are men supposed to that easily controlled in real-life?

I know it's the 21st century, and women are said to be much more aggressive these days, but, homey, most are not. Stop being such a knuckle-dragger, and use the head that sits on your neck. If movies were at all reflective of real life, doing so just might ensure that you'll not lose your job, your life's worth, or, dare I say, even your life!

And maybe we'll get much fewer of those kinds of scenes in movies, which are oh-so stale now (... that being the main point of this piece)...

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14 Comments

  • CareyCarey | April 11, 2013 9:12 AMReply

    Which way did he go? Which way did Tambay flow? I don't know but the comments brought it home.

    First, only Artbizzy would breakout Blue Velvet. I remember seeing that at it's USA premiere. I was like, "what the heck is going on with this flick", but I enjoyed it.

    Anyway, I'm feeling everyone who said there's nothing new here, because in real life this DOES happen on a daily basis. Yes, men do allow their little heads to lead their big heads. However, the truth IS all "attractive" women are not necessarily looking for Mr. Six Pack. Shiiiiiiiit, love is a funny thang, and we all know beauty is only skin deep. I mean, certainly there's game-game-game in the game of love, but beauty aside, I'm leaning toward what Bill Wither's said. I mean, I don't care if one is as attractive as Miss Black America or as ugly as Woopie Goldberg, there's a perfect mate somewhere. And that mate may be Morris Chestnut and Terrence Howard types, or they could be of the JJ Walker and CareyCarey variety, makes no difference, the story is the same. Tell 'em Bill... "My friends feel it's their appointed duty, they keep trying to tell me all you want to do is use me. But my answer to all that use me stuff is I want to spread the news that if it feels this good getting used, you just keep on using me until you use me up"

    And here's the big bang message--> "Talking about you using me but it all depends on what YOU DO. It ain't too bad the way you're using me, "CAUSE I SURE AM USING YOU TO DO THE THANGS YOU DO"

    That's right, Tupac said it "Fair exchange ain't no robbery" :-)

  • CC | April 11, 2013 2:33 PM

    Can I get an AMEN? What, don't tell me y'all have never experienced the sayings "love the one you're with" and "beauty is only skin deep" -huh?

    Shiiiiiiiit, I'll slide right by Miss Thang and put my bug in the ear of the lady with the skinny legs - in a heart beat. Don't get me wrong, I like 'em "fat" and "plump" and tenderly tight, but hey, love don't have no face.

  • artbizzy | April 11, 2013 1:58 AMReply

    It's really just a diluted, dumbed down, version of the femme fatale. Beauty seduces. But to be beautiful, manipulative, troubled and sexy...? Hoo boy. The femme fatale is the normal, regular guys shadow self that he desires to to mate with to unify with to the extent that he will ruin his life. Only the whole archetype of the femme fatale has become so shallow. She is a menace to the regular guy, the average guy, the "unnatractive" guy, because they will more easily fall for her. They want beauty for themselves. They want experience. But the femme fatale also helps these guys to go on an even deeper journey. David Lynch does this well in Blue Velvet. While Kyle Machlachlan is a handsome man he's definitely playing a nice, unsophisticated, regular small town guy who gets turned out by a really troubled, beautiful singer played by Isabella Rosellini. Hollywood doesn't want to go there with the femme fatale right now because she is a revolutionary force. She is a troubled yet empowered woman who brings a man to his deeper side. She is considered evil. Think witch trial hysteria. Hollywood wants to avoid that because it would mean that Hollwood would have to explore it's shadow side, too and who wants to do that in this day and age when one could make a lot more money playing it safe.

  • Monique a Williams | April 10, 2013 10:50 PMReply

    In the real world, men fall for this because they just wanna go along for the ride. The attention is worth whatever they have to give up. Same as these silly women falling for corny lines. They know its game, but they like playing...

  • getthesenets | April 10, 2013 5:22 PMReply

    Attractive people manipulate other people all day everyday.

    Sometimes I used to wonder/
    how the hell an ugly dude get a fly girl's number/

    He's getting juiced for his ducats/
    I tell a girl in a minute, yo I drive a bucket/

    and won't think nothing of it/
    she can ride or walk /either leave it or love it/

  • Akimbo | April 11, 2013 6:52 AM

    Yeah, not really getting this rant. Con men and women charm the opposite and same sex all the time in reality and in film. If it's well done and not a stale retread of the "hey big boy, my shirt's just so tight, why don't you blah, blah, blah, so I can blah, blah, blah," then it's just fine. What's TIRED is the nerdy/loser/"nice" guy shallowly lusting after the dream girl from afar and somehow convincing both himself and her that he deserves to be with her...she just needs to open her mind and stop being so shallow. Barf.

  • Marie | April 10, 2013 4:24 PMReply

    I've always felt that Hollywood movies are a reflection of the people who are essentially responsible for them which is the studio executives who are overwhelmingly white and male. The white male studio executives use films to perpetuate their own fantasies and their own prejudices. This is why most women's acting careers end the day they turn 40 (Michelle Pfeiffer is a prime example) and why actresses work so hard to get Oscars before 40. The white men in charge, as opposed to the moviegoing public, are only interested in women between the ages of 25 and 39. Numerous non-American actresses have longer careers in their home countries because this obsession with young women doesn't exist like it does in the US. The same is true with the Fat-Ugly-Stupid Men/Hot Women cliche. That's the fantasy of the fat, ugly, stupid studio executives and they perpetuate this fantasy in tv, film and advertising.

  • Darryl | April 10, 2013 3:22 PMReply

    Hollywood plays on these cliches because that's how they see and want the viewing public to be a cliche that don't have common sense or are not complex enough to digest complex stories and have common sense scenes. Cliches are easy to produce and make that's why you see so much of them in movies because if you tried the other route of doing complex stories or having common sense in scenes, you will have to actually work and you know them wall st hollywood execs are not about to work hard if they don't have to, they would rather sit back with their feet up counting money recycling the same formula over and over again eating up by an audience that has gotten too comfortable with it. The cliche Tambay is talking about, it can be done in a common sense way that can be a comedy or a drama.

  • Sergio | April 10, 2013 2:44 PMReply

    Hey I like the cliche it gives ugly stupid guys like me hope that we can get a hot chick. Like Ron Jeremy.The reason he's legend and a hero to so many guys is because he's NOT an adonis. Ron gives hope to the hopeless

  • Rocket | April 10, 2013 2:14 PMReply

    I'm with you on this. I'll add another one: The idiot husband/dad who can't find his way out of reusable bag and the all knowing wife/mother who has all the answers. I know you are talking about movies. But one of the reasons "Let's Stay Together" grates my nerves is they make both of the husbands act like complete simps. One is dumb as a door knob and the other has the backbone of jellyfish. Yes, I know its a comedy. But the jokes are almost always on those two. It gets old quick.

    Okay, I'll stop now.

  • mawon | April 10, 2013 1:33 PMReply

    Most women aren't horny? Riiight. I must've missed that lesson right along with women don't fart, shit or burp. They're not human beings or anything.

  • mawon | April 10, 2013 1:45 PM

    Ooooohhhh "homey"...lol, my bad. I'm tired.

  • Tambay | April 10, 2013 1:38 PM

    Put your glasses on. I didn't say "most women aren't horny." Read it again.

  • Aaron | April 10, 2013 1:32 PMReply

    AMEN!!!!!

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