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10 Actors Who Shouldn't Do Sex Scenes

By Spout | Spout July 29, 2009 at 5:40AM

by Christopher Campbell
17


 

Harvey Keitel (Bad Lieutenant; The Piano; Holy Smoke)


He’s done many sex scenes throughout his career, and he will continue doing them regardless of what we think. So the best we can do is avoid them, whether or not they’re as creepy as usual. Keitel is really not a bad looking man, yet his speech impediment certainly gets in the way of his sexiness. Plus, he chooses too many roles where he’s able to gratuitously flap his junk about and then use it for his characters’ misogynistic pleasure. Our least favorite Keitel sex scene is in Jane Campion’s Holy Smoke, and while it may be disturbing primarily for Kate Winslet’s urinary seduction, the scene would be a lot more watchable if Keitel wasn’t in it.


Ben Kingsley (Elegy)


There are plenty of sex scenes featuring less attractive old guys than Sir Ben Kingsley, but none of them make us think of Gandhi getting it on. In all fairness, Kingsley is a great enough actor that we can almost forget about his iconic role while watching him do it, but last year he had to go and be creepier than usual by making out with Mary-Kate Olsen in one film (The Wackness) and making love to Penelope Cruz in another (Elegy). He’s now completely ruined himself in our minds for all future sex scenes he desire to take on. No matter the age of the actress he beds.







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