Click to Skip Ad
Closing in...
Watch: Jesse Eisenberg And Kristen Stewart Go On In The Run In Red Band Trailer For 'American Ultra' Watch: Jesse Eisenberg And Kristen Stewart Go On In The Run In Red Band Trailer For 'American Ultra' The Top 10 Films Of The 2015 Cannes Film Festival The Top 10 Films Of The 2015 Cannes Film Festival 5 Innovative Ways The Michael Fassbender/Marion Cotillard 'Macbeth' Differs From Previous Versions 5 Innovative Ways The Michael Fassbender/Marion Cotillard 'Macbeth' Differs From Previous Versions New ‘Ant-Man’ Photos; Movie May Include More Marvel Cinematic Universe Characters New ‘Ant-Man’ Photos; Movie May Include More Marvel Cinematic Universe Characters Over 30 New 'Jurassic World' Photos, Plus 2 New Clips & Lots Of New TV Spots Over 30 New 'Jurassic World' Photos, Plus 2 New Clips & Lots Of New TV Spots Matt Damon Goes Interstellar Again In New Pics From Ridley Scott's 'The Martian' Matt Damon Goes Interstellar Again In New Pics From Ridley Scott's 'The Martian' Cannes Awards Winners: Jacques Audiard's 'Dheepan' Wins Palme d’Or; Rooney Mara Ties For Best Actress With ‘Carol’ Cannes Awards Winners: Jacques Audiard's 'Dheepan' Wins Palme d’Or; Rooney Mara Ties For Best Actress With ‘Carol’ First Look: Matt Damon As An Astronaut In Ridley Scott’s ‘The Martian’ First Look: Matt Damon As An Astronaut In Ridley Scott’s ‘The Martian’ Cannes Review: Justin Kurzel's 'Macbeth' Starring Michael Fassbender & Marion Cotillard Cannes Review: Justin Kurzel's 'Macbeth' Starring Michael Fassbender & Marion Cotillard Watch: Incredible Vintage Footage Of Audience Reactions To 'The Exorcist' In 1973 Watch: Incredible Vintage Footage Of Audience Reactions To 'The Exorcist' In 1973 Here's The Character Backstory For Doof aka Guitar Flamethrower Dude In 'Mad Max: Fury Road' Here's The Character Backstory For Doof aka Guitar Flamethrower Dude In 'Mad Max: Fury Road' The 10 Most Controversial Cannes Films Ever The 10 Most Controversial Cannes Films Ever More NSFW Posters For Gaspar Noe's 3D 'Love' Plus The Official Director's Statement More NSFW Posters For Gaspar Noe's 3D 'Love' Plus The Official Director's Statement Cannes: Watch A Three Way Makeout In The First Clip From Gaspar Noe’s 3D ‘Love’ Plus New NSFW Image Cannes: Watch A Three Way Makeout In The First Clip From Gaspar Noe’s 3D ‘Love’ Plus New NSFW Image New NSFW, Extremely Graphic, Adults-Only Poster For Gaspar Noe's 'Love' New NSFW, Extremely Graphic, Adults-Only Poster For Gaspar Noe's 'Love' The 25 Best Films Of 2015 We've Already Seen The 25 Best Films Of 2015 We've Already Seen The 25 Best Horror Films Of The 21st Century So Far The 25 Best Horror Films Of The 21st Century So Far The 20 Best TV Shows Of The 2013/2014 Season The 20 Best TV Shows Of The 2013/2014 Season 10 Movies Booed At Cannes 10 Movies Booed At Cannes All The Songs In 'Pitch Perfect' Including La Roux, David Guetta, Azealia Banks, Nicki Minaj & More All The Songs In 'Pitch Perfect' Including La Roux, David Guetta, Azealia Banks, Nicki Minaj & More

Watch: New Red Band Trailer For 'Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters' Reveals Another Crappy Looking January Movie

The Playlist By Rodrigo Perez | The Playlist January 4, 2013 at 5:40AM

Aside from say, "Kill List" "Haywire," to a more lesser, subjective extent "The Grey," good films are not meant to be released in January and 9.999999 times out 10 they are not. It's a dumping ground season for bad romantic comedies that have tested poorly ("Bride Wars"), lame spoof movies ("Meet the Spartans") horror-action dreck ("My Bloody Valentine 3D" and the like), wackjob oddities starring Nicolas Cage ("Season of the Witch") and whatever else needs to be released, but the studio has pretty much zero confidence in other than appealing to those that actively look at a bail-bond business rom-com starring Katherine Heigl and go, "Wow, that looks tremendous." And let's face it, January might be critical death, but it always does decent business at the box-office.
6
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters

Aside from say, "Kill List" "Haywire," and to a more subjective extent "The Grey," good films are not meant to be released in January and 9.999999 times out 10 they are not. It's a dumping ground season for bad romantic comedies that have tested poorly ("Bride Wars"), lame spoof movies ("Meet the Spartans") horror-action dreck ("My Bloody Valentine 3D" and the like), wackjob oddities starring Nicolas Cage ("Season of the Witch") and whatever else needs to be released, but the studio has pretty much zero confidence in other than appealing to those that actively look at a bail-bond business rom-com starring Katherine Heigl and go, "Wow, that looks tremendous." And let's face it, January might be critical death, but it always does decent business at the box-office.

In recent years, studios have tried to change January (and its often terrible cousin mouth February) into a slightly more respectable season, by throwing shelved, delayed and unwanted stepchildren projects that once had heat/buzz on them into this frame (see "The Wolfman," "The Green Hornet," "Edge Of Darkness") and hoping they'll stick with audiences that actually paid money to see some of the aforementioned gash in the first graph.

2013 isn't much different. While Noreweigan director Tommy Wirkola earned a lot of plaudits for his 2009 zombie/nazis movie, "Dead Snow," his Engllish-language feature-length debut, "Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters" has been delayed and then dumped despite the ostensibly good cast of Jeremy Renner, Gemma Arterton and Famke Janssen. Here's the synopsis:

After getting a taste for blood as children, Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) have become the ultimate vigilantes, hell bent on retribution. Now, unbeknownst to them, Hansel and Gretel have become the hunted, and must face an evil far greater than witches...their past.

So it already sounds and looks.... ungood and while the latest red-band trailer might appeal to fans of action, horror and gore, as well as filling out some of the backstory, there looks like there's no salvaging this one. Sporting some sort of modern steampunk fairytale vibe, "Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters" also co-stars Peter Stormare, Zoe Bell and Thomas Mann. There will always be an optimist out there that goes, "C'mon, look at that cast, I bet the January release date has nothing to do with its quality," but history shows that it usually does. Beauty, we suppose is in the eye of the beholder, but we know a turkey when we see one.  "Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters" is due January 25th. Watch the trailer below; in the latest annoying movie marketing technique, you have to verify your age with Facebook.

Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Renner, (skip)
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Arterton (skip)
Hansel and Gretel, Renner, Arterton (skip)
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Renner, Arterton (skip)
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Famke Janssen
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Arterton (skip)
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters (skip)
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Renner, Arterton (skip)
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Famke (skip)
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Gemma Arterton
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Renner
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Arterton
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Renner,

This article is related to: Jeremy Renner, Gemma Arterton, Famke Janssen, Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters, Film Trailers


The Playlist

The obsessives' guide to contemporary cinema via film discussion, news, reviews, features, nostalgia, movie music, soundtracks, DVDs and more.


E-Mail Updates