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Is This A Parody? Trailer For Sylvester Stallone's 'Bullet To The Head'

by Kevin Jagernauth
August 16, 2012 9:02 PM
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With "The Expendables 2" opening this weekend, its stars are using the opportunity to pimp their other forthcoming movies. Earlier today, Arnie got the lead out with a trailer for "The Last Stand" that, while totally rote, was at least identifiably a straight-faced action movie. Now, Sylvester Stallone drops "Bullet To The Head"... and we don't know what to think.

The movie was originally slated to open in April, but was pushed back amidst rumors of editing room squabbles, and that Stallone himself was recutting the movie shot by Walter Hill. But man, whether he did or not, it looks like the footage he had to work with was dreadful to start. Looking just barely above a straight-to-DVD offering, "Bullet To The Head" seems to have grabbed a cast that can barely read the cue cards off camera, let alone command halfway decent acting skills, to tell the story of a New Orleans hitman (Sly) and a Gotham cop (Sung Kang), who team up to take down the men responsible for their partners’ murders. With the eye-rolling and moldy one liners, and plethora of age related jokes ("They don't make records anymore.") we can't tell if this is a parody or not. It's not supposed to this bad, is it? It says something when Christian Slater is doing the best job of anybody in this thing.

"Bullet To The Head" opens on February 1, 2013.

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  • hank | August 18, 2012 4:07 AMReply

    now that you've removed the racist comment from this article why don't you just take the whole thing down and repost the trailer, along with some less juvenile reaction?

  • Phil | August 17, 2012 1:16 PMReply

    Maybe you had a problem with your internet connection when you watched the trailer? Because I didn't hear the "I. was. born. in. Flor. id. a." line come out that way. The cast seemed fine...Stallone is the only one who sounds like he "barely had command of the English language", but he always sounds like that, so what's so surprising?

  • Phil | August 17, 2012 3:17 PM

    It appears that the article was edited/updated and removed the part I referenced in my initial comment...

  • Michael Kang | August 17, 2012 1:05 PMReply

    I can't help but feel like there is a thinly-veiled racist crack in there. Sung Kang is my boy and I don't like seeing a criticism on his acting as if he was Jackie Chan in Rush Hour. Sung is American bred from Georgia and speaks 100% fine American English. Whatever bug is up Mr. Jagernauth's butt about Sly or Walter Hill, he does not need to resort to the lowest and ugliest form of insult.

  • vincent oshin | August 17, 2012 12:44 PMReply

    I t's based on a french graphic novel, still watching it!!!

  • Irons | August 17, 2012 12:28 PMReply

    This looks fun. The "writer" of this article seems to have a chip the size of a buick on his shoulder against anything action-related. Sad for him.

  • sergio | August 17, 2012 10:27 AMReply

    Walter Hill. That's enough for me

  • Fred | August 17, 2012 9:55 AMReply

    Good to see there is getting to be a healthy amount of defenders against the expected action film bias around here.

  • Julian | August 17, 2012 7:53 AMReply

    Actually, they do still make records. They even sell quite well, for a niche.

  • Sean | August 17, 2012 7:06 AMReply

    Well it def wasnt as bad as I thought your article was suggesting Playlist... I mean I expected FARRR worse after reading

    But still it is garbage lol I mean very like made for TV kinda look. The cinematography I feel like is to blame its horrible. And the acting is dreadful as well

    But it does have Sara Shahi from her hit show on USA who's freakin beautiful! lol

  • Del | August 17, 2012 5:46 AMReply

    What the hell you on about, ....this looks like a great action flick. STD/VOD??? Are you kidding?

  • Brad | August 17, 2012 5:13 AMReply

    Why so harsh? From the article I expected something much worse. Lungren worse. Movie looks decent.

  • Scott | August 17, 2012 4:58 AMReply

    oh no. it looks like- thomas jane- just dodge- a bullett- to his career-------------------------POWpowpow

  • ercd | August 17, 2012 4:19 AMReply

    exciting trailer. can't wait to see the whole film.

  • Thuan Dang | August 17, 2012 2:52 AMReply

    This reminds me so much of Blood and Bone. And not because of asian sidekick.

  • Leonardo | August 17, 2012 1:37 AMReply

    Both this and The Last Stand looks like decent action flicks

  • DS | August 17, 2012 1:27 AMReply

    This comment tread needs some balance. So, I agree to say that's maybe the worst trailer I have seen in years.

  • jean vigo | August 17, 2012 12:55 AMReply

    At least there's some place for this in the 3AM-guilty pleasure-nihilist-acknowledges it's badness-cable universe.

    For $20 I'd buy this DVD over "Tiny Furniture." But, that's just me....

  • Jesse | August 17, 2012 2:47 AM

    I consider myself a cinefile. I've got some pretty damn high standards. And, you know, I gotta agree with you on this.

  • bwaters | August 16, 2012 10:30 PMReply

    This looks way better than The Last Stand.

  • Ur mom | August 16, 2012 10:26 PMReply

    Rambo vs. Conan.

  • joe | August 16, 2012 10:17 PMReply

    Oh look, Playlist is trying to be the bitchy/snarky blog again. How adorable.

  • frank | August 16, 2012 10:11 PMReply

    haha. wow. looks like the playlist staff has their head up their own ass again. this looks absolutely no different than the arnold trailer from earlier in the day. you on crack dog? it's a fucking action movie with sly stallone.

  • Jim | August 16, 2012 10:04 PMReply

    No kidding, leave it alone critic. It's got f'in Rocky and Khal Drago fighting each other. It might not be a masterpiece, but I'll bet it's more fun than having a conversation with you.

  • Marcus | August 16, 2012 9:31 PMReply

    Oh come on critic, you're being too harsh. This doesn't look any worse than The Last Stand.. it's Walter Hill for crying out loud...

  • AS | August 16, 2012 9:30 PMReply

    I don't get it, what were you expecting? Bergman? It's an action movie with Sly Stallone....

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