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New 'Expendables 2' Poster Will Impregnate You And Every One Of Your Friends, Male And Female

The Playlist By Gabe Toro | The Playlist November 21, 2011 at 1:00PM

If "The Expendables" meant anything (and, aside from some serviceable action sequences, it didn't really), it was a chance to see a group of action icons interacting with each other, with several scenes imbued with the baggage brought from the filmographies of all those involved. Come for the Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis, stay for the Gary Daniels! Sylvester Stallone and company have listened to the complaints, bringing back the entire cast for "The Expendables 2" and giving some of them more to do than to just sit around and chat.
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Expendables 2 Poster Header

If "The Expendables" meant anything (and, aside from some serviceable action sequences, it didn't really), it was a chance to see a group of action icons interacting with each other, with several scenes imbued with the baggage brought from the filmographies of all those involved. Come for the Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis, stay for the Gary Daniels! Sylvester Stallone and company have listened to the complaints, bringing back the entire cast for "The Expendables 2" and giving some of them more to do than to just sit around and chat.

And if there was any doubt this time around that some cast members would be more than window dressing, this testosterone-fueled new poster certainly gives that notion a kick in the pants. While Millenium Films are claiming this is not an official poster, JoBlo has debuted the first artwork for the film, and aside from the gobbledygook credits (possibly the source of the studio's denial), it looks ready for action. In addition to two-time Expendables Sly, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren and a pretty pumped Terry Crews, there's also Arnold and Bruce, who cameoed in the first film but now show up packing some serious heat. Schwarzenegger, having been an elected official, could not be paid for his appearance in the first film, which accounts for his very few lines. But now that he's a citizen again, the Terminator is ready to make some heads roll.

While it's not certain who the unbilled female is on the poster (IMDb suggests it may be Nan Yu), she shows up as the vertical meat between a Jean-Claude Van Damme and Chuck Norris sandwich. The Norris Van Dammewich, if you will. Other cast members listed, but not pictured, include Randy Couture and Liam Hemsworth, but some have speculated how curious it seems that Jet Li is third billed but shows up nowhere in this artwork. Never fear, Li fans: the production is still ongoing, and Li has not yet shot any footage, as he'll only appear in a Chinese section of the story.

"The Expendables 2" (or "EX2") will punch through your stomach so hard it will make it a womb on August 17, 2012. There's no outside food allowed, so please keep your Norris Van Dammewich to yourself.

This article is related to: Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris, Jean-Claude van Damme, Terry Crews, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Bruce Willis, Jet Li, The Expendables 2, Dolph Lundgren