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New 'Expendables 2' Poster Will Impregnate You And Every One Of Your Friends, Male And Female

by Gabe Toro
November 21, 2011 1:00 PM
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Expendables 2 Poster Header

If "The Expendables" meant anything (and, aside from some serviceable action sequences, it didn't really), it was a chance to see a group of action icons interacting with each other, with several scenes imbued with the baggage brought from the filmographies of all those involved. Come for the Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis, stay for the Gary Daniels! Sylvester Stallone and company have listened to the complaints, bringing back the entire cast for "The Expendables 2" and giving some of them more to do than to just sit around and chat.

And if there was any doubt this time around that some cast members would be more than window dressing, this testosterone-fueled new poster certainly gives that notion a kick in the pants. While Millenium Films are claiming this is not an official poster, JoBlo has debuted the first artwork for the film, and aside from the gobbledygook credits (possibly the source of the studio's denial), it looks ready for action. In addition to two-time Expendables Sly, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren and a pretty pumped Terry Crews, there's also Arnold and Bruce, who cameoed in the first film but now show up packing some serious heat. Schwarzenegger, having been an elected official, could not be paid for his appearance in the first film, which accounts for his very few lines. But now that he's a citizen again, the Terminator is ready to make some heads roll.

While it's not certain who the unbilled female is on the poster (IMDb suggests it may be Nan Yu), she shows up as the vertical meat between a Jean-Claude Van Damme and Chuck Norris sandwich. The Norris Van Dammewich, if you will. Other cast members listed, but not pictured, include Randy Couture and Liam Hemsworth, but some have speculated how curious it seems that Jet Li is third billed but shows up nowhere in this artwork. Never fear, Li fans: the production is still ongoing, and Li has not yet shot any footage, as he'll only appear in a Chinese section of the story.

"The Expendables 2" (or "EX2") will punch through your stomach so hard it will make it a womb on August 17, 2012. There's no outside food allowed, so please keep your Norris Van Dammewich to yourself.

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  • Stephen | December 5, 2011 1:51 PMReply

    This the second time i am seeing all the stars in the ex part 2 movie i never seen the flim industry in my life
    all the stars r like in the sky everyday we will see them throught year

  • Rory | November 28, 2011 12:12 PMReply

    It's fake :(

  • padre | November 22, 2011 1:36 AMReply

    The idea is amazingly cool, but looking at that poster makes me realize again that we need a new generation of action stars. All those wrinkles depress the hell out of me.

  • chris | November 22, 2011 1:32 AMReply

    this movie could not fail this movie is going to kick ass to the 10th degree who can hate all this guys in this movie again plus more of the guys you love more this flick is going to rule!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Spider | November 21, 2011 9:59 PMReply

    This flick is gonna ROCK!

  • CP | November 21, 2011 3:35 PMReply

    I get a gun, you get a gun, we get a gun, heyyyyy (sing it with me) ...everybody gets a gun.

  • [A] | November 21, 2011 2:28 PMReply

    I know you're all hip and modern *but* I still use the keyboard a lot -- when you type your comment and hit tab, the first button that should be active is "submit" not "cancel".. don't you think?

  • Keegan | November 21, 2011 1:49 PMReply

    This is not an official poster as it has gibberish written at the bottom where the credits are.

    I’m sure that a press release is imminent with an official announcement for the cast, plot, etc. Van Damme, Norris, Atkins and Hemsworth can’t be the only new additions to the cast.

  • Drew | November 21, 2011 1:44 PMReply

    Not everyone is back, though, since Snarlsbad Caverns himself, Mickey Rourke, won't be making a return.

  • [A] | November 21, 2011 2:26 PM

    "Snarlsbad"? Terrific name (if real..)

  • TJ | November 21, 2011 1:30 PMReply

    Since we're on the topic of the governator, this is a must see.

  • tarja | November 21, 2011 1:14 PMReply

    JA,JA norris van dammewich.i'm not a big fan of this movie but is gonna be a hit.

  • Tim Strain | November 21, 2011 1:14 PMReply

    Governator's looking like he has lost a step. He's not even pointed a gun at anyone.

  • MS | November 21, 2011 3:52 PM

    He doesn't have to. His stare alone can stop a man's heart from beating...

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