So Hot Right Now: Trailer For 'Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters' Arrives

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by Kevin Jagernauth
September 4, 2012 12:14 PM
11 Comments
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Sorry, but every time we hear "Hansel" all we can think of is Will Ferrell following it up with "So hot right now." But whether or not the delayed "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" is "hot" remains to be seen, but judging from this first trailer we're thinking....not.

Boasting some pretty grim special effects, bad one liners and obvious stunt doubles, it seems pretty clear why Paramount moved the film from this spring to the barren theatrical landscape of early 2013. Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton -- who we both ordinarily love -- make a pretty odd pairing prancing around medieval forests and villages in "Resident Evil" gear ridding them of witches. But when five kids go missing, they have to face their biggest challenge yet, which appears to be more dodgy VFX.

All round this seems pretty uninspired and lifeless, with a wonky tone that never feels organic. And even as R-rated fare, it doesn't feel particularly edgy. But hey, we'd love to be proven wrong. "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" opens on January 11, 2013.

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11 Comments

  • oize | September 6, 2012 12:10 AMReply

    poor renner. dude was on the cusp of breaking out this year and totally killed his momentum with shit projects.

  • Lee | September 6, 2012 11:24 AM

    oh well, even a guy like Fassbender had his Jonah Hex moment..

  • d | September 6, 2012 1:18 AM

    Is this the only one you're referring to when you say "shit projects?"

  • vstupillo | September 4, 2012 10:18 PMReply

    Hey, but I've seen this one! Only back in the day it was called Van Helsing... oh, wait, was that Brothers Grimm?

  • Oogle monster | September 4, 2012 10:03 PMReply

    These witches look like they came off the set of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

  • max | September 4, 2012 2:16 PMReply

    renner and enough weed--good enough for me

  • Caius | September 4, 2012 1:31 PMReply

    Oh dear, another 'bastardization' of classic Faerie Tales and Literature. I wrote a blog entry about how Hollywood tends to 'Matrix-ize' everything. Let me guess, Hansel and Gretel will be doing fancy gun acrobatics, and there will be slow motion John Woo wooden daggers flying through the air. Not everything needs the Action Film treatment to be effective. Then again, whoever thought this was a good idea is likely clueless anyway.

    Sorry, but Jeremy Renner always looks so constipated to me. Why they feel the need to shove him in every film is beyond me.

  • Law | September 4, 2012 1:17 PMReply

    wrong move, Renner. Wrong. Move. It looks like some spoof movie or something, even worse than Season of The Witch. though, yeah, I admit I'm still going to watch this just for the sake of staring at Renner's arms.

  • Mohammed | September 4, 2012 1:01 PMReply

    I knew from the moment I heard that they hired the director of Dead Snow that this would be an instant frontrunner for the worst movie in the year to come. I saw Dead Snow and couldn't understand how such a bad excuse for a movie got such raves. Some people shouldn't be permitted to make movies, and this director is one of them. So sad for Renner.

  • ArcherSlyce | September 4, 2012 12:54 PMReply

    I had to google it (cause no one seems to care): that's from the guy who did Dead Snow! Well the trailer is awful (editing, music, punchlines, walking with explosion in the back) and it seems they're really riding the Resident evil/Underworld bandwagon indeed (question being : why ???).

  • james | September 4, 2012 12:53 PMReply

    Oh... dear.

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