Let's hear it for the new face of Lion's Gate!

It must be nice to be at Lion's Gate these days—profits are through the roof and the distributor has money burning a hole in its pocket. How else can The Reeler explain LGF's insane recent spending spree:

--June 29: LGF yields a $110 million profit turnaround from 2004 to 2005 on the basis of successes like Fahrenheit 9/11 (sorry, Disney), Saw, Open Water and The Punisher. During the same period, revenues more than doubled from $375 million to $842 million. Home video hits like The Cooler also contribute to the spike. "Let's go shopping!" says LGF boss Jon Feltheimer.

--June 30: LGF announces it will spend $182 million on 18 films in fiscal 2006—more than it has spent on anything, like, ever. Feltheimer tells Variety that even though "(w)e've trained the consumer to have a shorter attention span—with new big titles coming out week after week," LGF is still "scrambling" to fill orders on home video. Because, as the adage goes, "Nothing succeeds like ADD."

--July 7: LGF contracts with graphic novelist Steve Niles to develop a series of film adaptations starring box-office gold brick Thomas Jane. Under the agreement, Niles and Jane will form their own production arm, separate from the one Niles has with LGF's other stable-boy Rob Zombie. Terms are not disclosed, but the throaty cry of "Incest is best!" is heard echoing from LGF's Chambers Street offices.

--July 14: LGF drops another undisclosed amount on the 332-title film library belonging to Europe's Modern Times Group. The selections include iconic flicks like Dirty Dancing and Conan the Barbarian, inspiring LGF to sketch out a few special editions commemorating the films' 20th and 25th anniversaries, respectively, in 2007. Plus, LGF could potentially launch a reality show based on Dirty Dancing. No word is available yet on who will finance Cynthia Rhodes' abortion now that Jerry Orbach has passed on.

--July 15: LGF jumps into bed with Long Island's own LL Cool J, agreeing to produce films under his Alchemy banner exclusively for LGF. As you might expect, the rapper was ecstatic:

"This is the perfect transition for me, as I can now pour all the energy and creative juices I have learned over the years into this fresh and exciting producing venture," Cool said.

Hell, yes, Cool! We should all the good fortune to "learn creative juices," especially with pockets as deep as Lions Gate's at our sides. Alas, we must continue to live vicariously through S.W.A.T. and Rollerball. Here is hoping neither you nor LGF let us down—we are counting on you!