The lovely, garrulous Maggie Cheung plots her escape(Photo: STV)

The Reeler dropped by the Asia Society Friday night to check in with Hong Kong icon Maggie Cheung, who was in town last week for the opening of the Asian American International Film Festival. The idea was to get a picture or two and maybe have a word with Cheung before she collected the festival's CineVisionary Award, which she received prior to a screening of her new film Clean.

I mean, that was the idea—that is the way it usually works. Publicists invite your coverage, you attend cheerfully (at least I do), the stars do their jobs. Rinse and repeat. Forty-five minute delays like Friday's are pretty much par for the course, and they can even be quite useful to help formulate just the right question to ask that celebrity when he or she arrives at your end of the line.

But what do you do when the celebrity never gets to your end of the line? When the whole operation keeps you waiting for the picture at right and tries squirreling the actress away before any of the reporters on hand can ask any questions? I do not know what you would do, but dammit, I have a job to do.

So here, in its entirety, is The Reeler's (and the entire Asian American International Film Festival "press corps'," for that matter) exclusive, penetrating conversation with Maggie Cheung:

STV: Maggie, can you talk about being the toast of New York City for these last few days?
MC: It's a lot of talking for two days. It's great. Thank you. (Exit stage left)

No, Maggie—thank you. Thank. You.

Ugh.