James Toback (R) hands off the coveted High Times Stony bong-trophy to original Z-Boy Tony Alva (Photo: STV)

Having long ago given up pot for the more urgent, urbane pleasures of heroin, The Reeler thought High Times Magazine's Stony Awards would be the last place it would find itself late on a Wednesday night. Alas, the velvet rope unclasped, clearing a path down the event's green carpet and into Spirit's smoky West Side recesses for a glimpse at the festivities.

I figure the event's infrequency had to be part of the gag, but High Times editors explained that this was the first Stonys since 2002--evidently nobody could get their shit together enough to organize the "annual" event either of the last two years. At any rate, last night's presentation scoured pot culture for the finest work of the last 18 months, such as Bill Murray's and Sissy Spacek's respective toking scenes from The Life Aquatic and A Home at the End of the World. Sony Pictures Classics' Tom Bernard--who accepted Philip Seymour Hoffman's Best Actor Stony several years ago for Love Liza--reappeared this year to collect a "Best Restoration" prize for re-releasing Antonioni's The Passenger.

Just before fleeing in complete terror, however, The Reeler spotted old pal James Toback, another Stonys alum who had spent the better part of three hours in the VIP section fog waiting to present the Best Picture bong-trophy (seriously) to The Lords of Dogtown. Toback declined to speak with me this time around--"Not now, not now, call me tomorrow. I have to try and clear my head," he explained--but he was a little more talkative when he finally got his turn onstage.

"I feel at home in this crowd of people who are living on the other side," Toback "I just got this trophy from Deauville as part of this tribute they did--I have it next to the bong on the mantelpiece. I said to my 5-year-old son, 'Which do you like better: the bong or this trophy?' And he said, 'The bong, Dad. Always the bong.' "

Quite classically, Toback preceded his presentation with a blast at Bernard's parent company Sony Pictures, which he consciously or otherwise blamed for "suffocating" Dogtown in its crib. "It needs time and space to find its audience," Toback said. "It's good that High Times calls attention to movies that are otherwise missing the boat not because of any lack in the films themselves, but because of the total fuck-up in the media conglomeration."

Yeah, I mean, jeez, Sony--the pot crowd has a great point. Roll out of bed starving at 2 p.m. and watch productivity and profits skyrocket! Either way, I think there is a future in drug-related award presentations; I, for one, am all about the Noddies, celebrating positive portrayals of junkies in the media. The Crackies might be good, as well, although everybody knows Natasha Lyonne would sweep that shit. Anyone have any other suggestions?