And the Oscar for Best Over-Hyped Musical Romp goes to...

If you are anything like me, you may have wondered how former Variety columnist Army Archerd was going to occupy his time after retiring from the gossip rigors after half a century. Would he hit the links? Would he do some traveling? Well, maybe, but the truth is that this guy will never slow down. He is a scoop magnet!

Take, for example, yesterday's late-afternoon, "Web-only" dispatch crystallizing the latest travesty to befall the legends of two otherwise classic films:

With the hope of an Oscar nomination, Mel Brooks has written a song for the film version of The Producers.

"There's Nothing Like A Show On Broadway" is sung over the credits by co-stars Nathan Lane and Mathew Broderick.

Thomas Meehan, who partnered with Brooks on the book and script of The Producers, said Brooks came up for the idea for the new tune "when we were working on the script last summer."

The duo is now also at work on the book for the musicalized Young Frankenstein with Susan Stroman to again direct as she had the legit and filmed Producers.

"With hopes of an Oscar"? Well, at least Brooks is honest; I mean, there is only so much money you can wring out of a retread before you aim a little higher, right? Mad props to Archerd, too, for unpacking the A-B section of the Rolodex for this nugget and proving you can take the columnist out of the gossip, but you can't take the gossip out of the columnist.