If I spent what Heath Ledger probably spends on clothing, I would wear the same thing all the time, too (Photos: Open All Night)

The kids over at Open All Night have had a busy couple of days handling a few exotic red-carpet goings-on I missed for one reason or another. First of all, The Reeler had one of its long-unanswered questions resolved: What the hell ever happened to those Glamour Magazine-produced short films that yielded Gwyneth Paltrow's directing debut and a number of other putative stabs at Hollywood's penis-possessing hegemony? Were they ever finished? Would they ever screen as a group?

Ha--not only would they screen, but they evidently packed the UA Union Square last Thursday at a B-list winter wonderland. First-time filmmaker Trudie Styler made a brash show of her independence, arriving with husband Sting, paralyzing lobby traffic and all but sticking a pink flag in Lower Manhattan and claiming it for Glamour.

Heath Ledger, on the other hand, was not-so-Glamour-ready last night. According to OAN eagle-eye Bennett Marcus:

(W)e still learned something about the elusive Mr. Ledger. Along with a new baby and a $3 million house in Brooklyn, Heath owns two sport coats, two shirts, one tie, one sweater, and no iron. He wore the same tie and black sweater, but different rumpled shirts, to both his Brokeback Mountain premiere on Tuesday and the Casanova premiere on Sunday.

Goddamnit! Why does Open All Night get all the good scoops? I am busting my ass over here trying to decode Armond White's true essence while right under my nose, Heath Ledger is pulling shit out of the hamper before running off to see Casanova. Next you are probably going to tell me the sweater had blood on the sleeve, and it was tucked inside another sweater, and it symbolizes his love for the owner of the neighborhood laundromat who takes Sundays off. Tragic indeed.