I don't care about Morton's Oscar nomination--Matt Damon wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick (Photo: STV)

Pardon my late start, but Harvey Weinstein's Most Outrageous Gossippy Blast Ever landed me in the hospital yesterday with a broken jaw. Of course, this has happened before-- although in the past, it usually involved money or some garish corporate "synergy." This time, however, The Scoop's Jeanette Walls shows Harvey cutting right to the sensitive indie bone as only he can. And I will be on painkillers for weeks:

Matt Damon and Heath Ledger were furious about the casting of Lena Headey in The Brothers Grimm, but a producer stuck with her because he felt that the actress Damon and Ledger wanted wasn’t sexy enough.

Damon, Ledger, director Terry Gilliam and many other people connected with the film were passionately vying for talented and quirky actress Samantha Morton to get the role, according to a behind-the-scenes account of the flick that’s been published in the U.K., but Harvey Weinstein, co-head of Miramax which was a producer on the film, put the kibosh on her.

“Samantha Morton! You must be kidding me!” Weinstein said, director Gilliam told Bob McCabe, author of the book Dreams and Nightmares, which has just been published in the U.K. “You think Matt or Heath would want to [bleep] that?”

That is not even the entire item, and I still do not know where or how to start trying to rationalize it. I mean, what is better: Walls referring to Harvey simply as "a producer" on first reference, or closing your eyes and imagining Harvey on the phone in Tribeca, leaning back in his throne and winking at his manicurist as he calls Samantha Morton unfuckable? Or not even Samantha Morton, but just.... "that."

Or maybe the best part is that there is actually a "behind-the-scenes" book about a film nobody liked or even really saw. Either way, it is nice to see that Harvey ultimately found "that" useful enough to approve for a role in The Libertine, even as I am sure he will get around to blaming the film's imminent failure on Morton soon enough. Poor thing.