I had a meeting on Tuesday with the director of marketing from PhilipsNizer, the law firm where my lawyer Peter Fields is a partner. PhilipsNizer is interested in putting together a series of discussions for filmmakers, producers and writers and I suggested dedicating a discussion to Not-For Profit film organizations. Vikki, the marketing director then asked if I would attend a meeting for Not-For Profits the following night (last night) which coincidentally PhilipsNizer was hosting.

If you ever feel a strong desire to doubt your existence, I suggest you attend a meeting for Not-For Profit Organizations.

Understanding that many art oriented organizations are Not-For Profit, none of them were represented at last night's meeting. So not only was I the only non Not-For Profit Organization, I was the only organization representing the arts community. The evening consisted of an hour of networking prior to the guest speaker, therefore people began introducing themselves and their companies and enquiring about The Reel Roundtable (it was on my name tag). I suddenly realized that I was ignoring their questions and continued to ask them about their organizations.

As much as I love film and what I do; listening to the people who founded organizations and have spent their lives focusing on helping battered women, the homeless, the hungry, war veterans and disabled people to name a few...I simply did not feel up to discussing my story... veteran filmmakers, hungry artists and disabled studios.

There was one organization in particular, which I felt had made an amazing difference, so I offered to forward his information to some documentary filmmakers and if they were interested in working with him, then maybe it would help in getting more exposure. Seeing his face light up made me a feel a little better...for about 30 seconds.

After the event, I was heading over to pick up my friend Adam who lives about 15 blocks from PhilipsNizer. While I was walking and pondering over the lives I had just encountered, one of those guys on a bike with a carriage pulled up along side and kindly offered a free ride in his carriage. So I jumped in and enjoyed a beautiful evening ride up Fifth Avenue. The tranquility of midtown at night allowed me to forget my non Not-For Profit existence.