Click to Skip Ad
Closing in...
Troubled Western 'Jane Got a Gun' Rescued as Relativity Files for Bankruptcy (Updated) Troubled Western 'Jane Got a Gun' Rescued as Relativity Files for Bankruptcy (Updated) 'The Witch' Won't Open Until 2016, But Its Sundance-Winning Director Has a New Film 'The Witch' Won't Open Until 2016, But Its Sundance-Winning Director Has a New Film Charles Aidikoff Screening Room Shutters: End of an Era for LA Critics? Charles Aidikoff Screening Room Shutters: End of an Era for LA Critics? How HBO's 'Ballers' Fails Sports Fans How HBO's 'Ballers' Fails Sports Fans Michael Moore Reveals Stealth NSA Project 'Where to Invade Next' on Periscope Michael Moore Reveals Stealth NSA Project 'Where to Invade Next' on Periscope Showtime Chief on David Lynch's 'Twin Peaks' Revival: "It's His Show" Showtime Chief on David Lynch's 'Twin Peaks' Revival: "It's His Show" Toronto Film Festival Lineup: What Did They Get? Toronto Film Festival Lineup: What Did They Get? Discover the Brothers Quay, Identical Twin Animators Who Inspired Christopher Nolan Discover the Brothers Quay, Identical Twin Animators Who Inspired Christopher Nolan Richard Linklater's Untitled New Film Pushed to 2016, Might Direct Jennifer Lawrence Movie Richard Linklater's Untitled New Film Pushed to 2016, Might Direct Jennifer Lawrence Movie Jill Soloway Says "There Is an All Out-Attack" on Female Filmmakers Jill Soloway Says "There Is an All Out-Attack" on Female Filmmakers 'Steve Jobs' Joins Fall Festival Contenders as NYFF Centerpiece Gala: What's Coming Up and What's Not (UPDATED) 'Steve Jobs' Joins Fall Festival Contenders as NYFF Centerpiece Gala: What's Coming Up and What's Not (UPDATED) Top 10 Takeaways: Holdover 'Ant-Man' Tops Blah Week, Summer Slot for 'Southpaw' Pays Off Top 10 Takeaways: Holdover 'Ant-Man' Tops Blah Week, Summer Slot for 'Southpaw' Pays Off Arthouse Audit: Is 'Phoenix' This Year's 'Ida'? 'Mr. Holmes' Stays Strong Arthouse Audit: Is 'Phoenix' This Year's 'Ida'? 'Mr. Holmes' Stays Strong Friday Box Office: Sandler's 'Pixels' Gets Mixed Response, 'Paper Towns,' 'Southpaw' Not Far Behind Friday Box Office: Sandler's 'Pixels' Gets Mixed Response, 'Paper Towns,' 'Southpaw' Not Far Behind Scott Foundas Explains Why He's Leaving Film Criticism--Again--for Amazon Studios Scott Foundas Explains Why He's Leaving Film Criticism--Again--for Amazon Studios Congrats to Monica Bellucci: She's Making History Congrats to Monica Bellucci: She's Making History Watch: The Secret Ingredient to David Lynch's Disorienting Cinema Watch: The Secret Ingredient to David Lynch's Disorienting Cinema First Look: 'No' Director Pablo Larraín Channels 'Neruda' with Gael García Bernal First Look: 'No' Director Pablo Larraín Channels 'Neruda' with Gael García Bernal Why Kevin Costner Paid for 'Black or White' (New Trailer, Sneak Preview Q & A) Why Kevin Costner Paid for 'Black or White' (New Trailer, Sneak Preview Q & A) Gabriel García Márquez and Akira Kurosawa Talk Film, Writing and 'Rhapsody in August' in 1991 Gabriel García Márquez and Akira Kurosawa Talk Film, Writing and 'Rhapsody in August' in 1991

Summer's Nine Worst Movie Trailers: Green Lantern, Three Musketeers, Change-Up, Mr. Popper

Thompson on Hollywood By Sophia Savage | Thompson on Hollywood June 13, 2011 at 9:00AM

The trailers that played in front of X-Men: First Class -- a disappointment in itself after so many strong early reviews -- were about as inspiring as January Jones' line delivery. We were, however, inspired to compile this list of trailers that have turned their films into musts-to-avoid. We can't decide which looks worse, Green Lantern (June 17) or The Three Musketeers (October 14) (you can vote in our poll below). The former is a reportedly $300 million movie that should guarantee Ryan Reynolds is never taken seriously again, with co-star/man-candy Blake Lively's over-exposure far more entertaining than the sub-par CGI aliens. As for Musketeers, the new trailer now playing at a theater new you (the old one is below) plays like soft-core porn for 15-year old girls.
16
Thompson on Hollywood


The trailers that played in front of X-Men: First Class -- a disappointment in itself after so many strong early reviews -- were about as inspiring as January Jones' line delivery. We were, however, inspired to compile this list of trailers that have turned their films into musts-to-avoid. We can't decide which looks worse, Green Lantern (June 17) or The Three Musketeers (October 14) (you can vote in our poll below). The former is a reportedly $300 million movie that should guarantee Ryan Reynolds is never taken seriously again, with co-star/man-candy Blake Lively's over-exposure far more entertaining than the sub-par CGI aliens. As for Musketeers, the new trailer now playing at a theater new you (the old one is below) plays like soft-core porn for 15-year old girls.

Milla Jovovich and Juno Temple are going to have a hard time looking pretty next to Orlando Bloom, Logan Lerman, Matthew Macfadyen and Luke Evans. With the arrival of the film's new poster, ThePlaylist considers which cast member is humiliated the most, and points out that based on EW's on-set interview (below) with Bloom, he was "was Richard Harris-level drunk throughout the entire filming, so he may have no recollection of being in the film at all, saving him the humiliation."

And then there's the ample array of juvenile trash sucking at the teat of the summer box office: Mr. Popper's Penguins (June 17), The Smurfs in 3D (July 29) and Zookeeper (July 8), which just have us asking "why?" Not to be excluded from our consideration of horrible trailers are the crude reworkings of plots already thoroughly exploited: Friends with Benefits (July 22), Horrible Bosses (July 8) and The Change-Up (August 5). Justin Timberlake's alleged appeal continues to amaze us. And of course there's the girl-fantasy flick Monte Carlo, shoving annoying teenage girls (and celebs playing caricatures of stereotypes they represent) down our throats. As for Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts? We'd love to love it, but Larry Crowne looks like a confused, lifeless mess.

We're actually looking forward to Transformers: Dark of the Moon compared to these box office abominations. Here's TOH's summer preview.

Which looks the worst?
Green Lantern
Three Musketeers
Friends with Benefits
Mr. Popper's Penguins
The Change-Up
Zookeeper
Monte Carlo
The Smurfs
Larry Crowne
  
pollcode.com free polls



This article is related to: Box Office, Directors, Genres, Headliners, Video, Summer Movies, Marketing, Summer, Trailers


E-Mail Updates








Thompson on Hollywood

Born and raised in Manhattan, Anne Thompson grew up going to the Thalia and The New Yorker and wound up at grad Cinema Studies at NYU. She worked at United Artists and Film Comment before heading west as that magazine's west coast editor. She wrote for the LA Weekly, Sight and Sound, Empire, The New York Times and Entertainment Weekly before serving as West Coast Editor of Premiere. She wrote for The Washington Post, The London Observer, Wired, More, and Vanity Fair, and did staff stints at The Hollywood Reporter and Variety. She eventually took her blog Thompson on Hollywood to Indiewire. She taught film criticism at USC Critical Studies, and continues to host the fall semester of “Sneak Previews” for UCLA Extension.