A Must-See Lost Classic

By tully | "Boredom at Its Boredest" by Michael Tully August 17, 2006 at 2:00AM

A Must-See Lost Classic
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First of all, I'd like to send my own farewell to Bruno Kirby. I liked him in pretty much everything, but my favorite work that he ever did was on "The Larry Sanders Show," where he hilariously mocked his own persona. So long, Bruno.

Secondly, I revisited TALLADEGA NIGHTS last night with a batch of friends that hadn't seen it, and I have to say that it was wayyyyy funnier the first time. Still, I'm sticking to my word and campaigning for Sasha Baron Cohen for Best Supporting Actor. His performance is the stuff of legend.

Lastly, Christof Gebert and I were pointed in the direction of a lost 1980s masterpiece by the one and only David Wingo (side note: I've got my hands on a pre-mastered yet mixed copy of the Ola Podrida record and it is fucking GREAT). The film stars John Stamos, Vanity, and Gene Simmons. It is called NEVER TOO YOUNG TO DIE, and it might be the most insane thing I've ever seen. Seriously, this thing rivals TROLL 2, SLEEPAWAY CAMP, and NO RETREAT, NO SURRENDER for the title of "So-Retarded-It's-Pure-Genius." I can't even describe it. But I will say, with 100% sincerity, that Gene Simmons delivers a staggeringly assured performance. His portrayal of Velvet Von Ragner, the evil hermaphrodite ("He's a hermaphrodite... Half man... Half woman!"), is terrifying and disgusting. And he gives it his all. What was he thinking??? If you're into movies like this--which, unfortunately, Gebert and I are--this is must-see entertainment. If you're not--which, hopefully, you aren't--run flailing from the box cover. It just might ruin your life.

This article is related to: Film in General